Author: makwolf703

The Dating World and Social Media

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In recent years the dating world has exploded with changes to accessibility, media portrayals, and the societal shifts of what is known as “modern dating”. One key example showing this is seen within the Netflix series You that premiered in 2018 on Lifetime. This series follows Joe Goldberg through his dating experiences, but with a dark twist. It shows the newness of the dating world within social media, but also the old ways of dating. It shows commentary over the ideas of dating within Tinder versus in person meeting, the questionable parts of online dating, and to an extent the lack of privacy within modern dating.

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Dating as a whole has been revolutionized in recent years through the new doors of social media. Apps like Tinder, Hot or Not, and even throughout various social media platforms. All of these have continued the platform of RSS content. It has opened the door to user connections on the basis of a dating app. This revolutionized the previous in person and then dating websites into what is seen today. What was possible years ago in dating has been completely changed when looking at the role technological shifts and social media have opened the doors to within the last 10 to 15 years alone.

The art of dating itself has been around and transformed for generations. Whether this be courtship or arranged marriages, dating has become a more modern and individual aspect of life. Dating in recent years has changed significantly due to the changes of technology and accessibility among users of these platforms previously mentioned.

It is a hot topic that is extremely relevant to this day and age among millennials into older generations. What defines a relationship in the past versus with modern technology has changed immensely. For many it’s a Facebook status change, but for others it may be a post on Instagram or a mention in one’s bio. This creates a need for likes, comments, and recognition over one’s relationship, versus a feeling of content found within the relationship itself. Yet at the same time one is able to express their relationship more openly and share this with various family members or friends. It can open the doors to ghosting versus breaking the relationship off with someone, freak outs over no responses, and even the definition of a relationship is up for question.

Modern dating in the digital age has a large variety of pros and cons, especially when looking at social medias role within it. Specific pros according to Marlo Lundak are options, connections, and comfort. The options of an individual are in extreme variety and the connection one can create is capable with many more than before. Rather than having to go out into the open, one can date from the safety of their home, behind a screen. Yet at the same time Lundak expresses the cons of exposure, the death of chivalry, and an uptake in jealously. While social media has opened the doors to much, it has killed off and upped the stakes of negative attributes. One may find an issue with the apps on anothers phone, the posts they make, or the lack of actively seeking another out in person. The digital culture itself has exploded with not only creating these connections and abilities between users, but allowing for relationships to bloom further.

Not only has social media played a pivotal role in the changes of dating and modern culture, but the changes of technology have gone hand and hand within these new experiences. According to PsychAlive dating and connection have changed within the technological world. The “games” of dating have switched, the choices available extend further with the added access of technology, and so much more. Psychologically there is a reward system found within the newness of technology and social media, as notifications become an integral part of this culture.

All in all, while modern dating has changed in many ways, social media has opened so many doors within this. There may be modern situations of meeting a SO (significant other) in person, but often on college campuses this is seen off of apps like Tinder or Instagram.

Medium: My Take After Some Investigation

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Earlier this week I took some time checking out Medium, an online collection of blogs, various writings, articles and more. Through my time on Medium I specifically checked out articles surrounding the topic of Self Love and Relationships on this platform.

Initially I checked out a blog by Hailey Magee titled “You Are Not ‘Too Much’ To Be Loved. Here’s Why.” The blogger initially starts off telling stories of learning what made her seemingly ‘unlovable’, something many of us can simply relate to on many levels. Whether it was being see as annoying at one point or another, or being called clingy, these words and reactions stick with us throughout our lives. Yet, Magee had another way of dealing with it all and strove to prove that we as women, and humans in general, are not ‘too much’. Specifically I loved her argument that “Those of us who give ourselves permission to feel deeply give ourselves the gift of fully participating in this world”. She continued by expressing the inability to control how others respond and it is not on you to react for them. The needs for finding those who love and support, not tear down was key. Her points all in all created a feeling of boost and served as reminder to her readers, myself included, that one can truly rewire themselves even throughout the harder days.

Next I looked at “What You Deserve From Your Relationships” by Jessica Wildfire. She took from the classic ‘self improvement’ idea and argued that who you are is already good enough. She continued on to speak on what each person deserves and the worth already instilled in them. This was a post I felt needs to be heard and I was happy to stumble across. It continued on the train that was started in the first post I witnessed. Both spoke over the ideas of worth being found in self not by how others see you, but your worth dictates a worth of being treated as more. Adding to these ideas was that each of us deserves to be treated better than the “bronze rule” a rule in which people can walk all over you as they might like.

The third I looked at was “This Is How To Love Yourself When Nobody Else Does” by Thought Catalog. As I continued into this blog I appreciated the continuation of ideas I was noticing with a twist of their own in each post. Medium gave space to write as they might ad allow a space of encouragement to be created. One clear point I enjoyed from this blog was the idea that a definition of self worth comes from the self, not from those around you or other aspects. This post pushed for contentment in self over contentment in others that translates to self. As a college student this was a sore spot that needed to be hit as a reminder.

Lastly I checked out “The Moment I Chose Myself” by Vivian Dang which especially spoke on standing up for oneself in a similar, or even greater, fashion to how one stands up for others. She spoke on how others may not necessarily respond well, but it is necessary. I think one big piece within this would be the idea that there is a right and wrong way to stand up for ones self, but the importance is others are not in the right to walk all over you. A feeling of guiltiness is often around as Dang expressed, but something big is self-advocating.

Throughout my searching through Medium I found a variety of content. Although I enjoyed the ability to surf through ideas and explore various topics, I found a difficulty in simply finding specific pages/content surrounding topics. There was a main page, but lack of finding interest sections after my initial interest answers. I want to explore this more and see what else I can find. My experience was one of wondering where exactly other content would be found and what some of the random other tabs were exactly.

In general, I would certainly recommend this platform to aspiring writers, those seeking information, or simply a good read.

Martin Luther King Jr. Day 2020

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Honorable Justice John Charles Thomas
Unfortunately, a photo was not able to be taken at the event itself this evening

A day of history and a day of reflection. Martin Luther King Jr. Day at Christopher Newport University was one for the books. Although I had wished to see more events or even have a total day of remembrance, my hope would be that within the next year there would be continued change and reflection. Due to assignments and other responsibilities, I was unable to attend most of the commemorative events but I was able to attend the speech of the honorable Justice John Charles Thomas, which was powerful in and of itself. A man who has had an incredible journey through the walks of life and in working to better the world.

He is a poet, a judge, and much more. Throughout his speech the focus being on Dr. King with his own personal twist. He had met Dr. King at least twice and grown up in the midst of the changes of the Civil Rights Movement. He helped to integrate schools through being within that system and helped to show us how to truly experience King.

Thomas spoke on how often we get caught up in the magic of King’s speeches and his voice, yet we are to understand beyond the words. He continued on describing the correlation of themes among speeches and letters of King to what things we as an audience even today are meant to pick out. “All of us ought to be on the search for justice” This idea was continued and pressed into as he spoke of all of us being tied together as one. He described diversity in nature and the world showing us the need for it.

I appreciated his description of the answers being in us, but we sometimes have to reach out regardless of what one may look like. “It is our job to understand better” followed by a description of what liberal arts truly are.

There are so many more incredible words of wisdom and dissecting of King that was discussed. I truly was awestruck and inspired to push forward. He pushed for a belief that we all can take on the giants in our lives, injustice hate etc., through taking it piece by piece. Simply said, show kindness. I truly believe this in and of itself is something each person can take and apply to their life in more ways than one. We just have to be willing to try it.

Who am I and Why this Blog?

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A look into what in the world we’re getting into

Hi!

My name is Kenzie and this blog is a place of expression and newness. I’ve never been a big one for putting my words out there, but this could be a cool space to check that out

This blog is meant to be a space of realness, honesty, and understanding what it’s truly like to be a Sophomore college student.

A little about myself:

I’m the youngest of 3 and from Northern Virginia. I’v.e basically lived outside of D.C. most of my life.

I attend Christopher Newport University, a small liberal arts college in Newport News where I am currently in my second semester of my sophomore year.

I lead a Freshmen women’s small group, am involved with my campus ministry InterVarsity, and am the Vice President of my campus’ International Justice Mission chapter.

More than anything I find this as a place to share what I’m learning and seeing in the world around me

I hope you will join me on this journey!